Loss: Journey from hole to whole
The Second Christmas
I have been really sad today, Christmas Eve Day. This is the second Christmas without Bob. I wonder if I was still numb last Christmas and that this is the first “feeling” Christmas? I have done so many things to grieve, grow, and graduate from this process. I...
Learnings to date
As I have passed the year and half mark of Bob’s death, what have I learned? It has been a rough road but it has had some fruits — some are sweet, some are bittersweet, some never ripened, and some are rotten! Here are some of the learnings.I have discovered Qigong...
Whose Circle Is It?
Whose Circle Is It? As I have been working to create a new life since Bob died, this question and some of its corollaries have been on my mind. After a partner dies it is so easy to feel not whole. The other day I read a better image. The gist of the article was...
Labels
We can attach so much meaning to a word. I was reading something in which someone called “Widow” a label. By extension, then, so is “Single.” That got me to thinking about the difference between the words and whether there was a difference between “widow” and...
Grief is Weird
This grief stuff is weird. I’ve just passed the 17 month point since Bob died and usually life is easier. I have lots of days that have lots of joy in them; and lots that have lots of tears. And it is so inconsistent. I am enjoying writing and teaching Qigong...
Rings, Again
Since Bob died rings have been a constant in my life. What to do with them, which to wear, what do they mean - lots of questions. Some friends, I suspect, think I am obsessed with the symbolism of the rings. For me they are not jewelry - they are symbols and I have...
Completion of a Lesson?
I doubt if the big lessons in life are ever completed, but there is a point where they can stop - like an essay test when you know you could write more, but you decide that you have done enough to answer the question. I am wondering if that is where I am on this...
Father’s Day #2
Father’s Day fifteen months after Bob died. This has been an odd day. My daughter is just (late afternoon) getting home from a conference that she and her family attended. My son is at his home with his family. I wished the Dads in both families a happy Father’s Day...
I Don't Want to Do Anything!
Two exciting projects are in my life now. This website with the writing that it has inspired and teaching Qigong classes. I talk about both of them and get really excited and have plans for both of them that keep me thinking and planning and plotting. And … I don’t...